While their curly-haired rescue dog napped on the floor, an Italian couple logged on to a late-night video call with their American surrogate, sunbathing in her garden in Oregon. The fathers-to-be cooed as she told them she was playing fairy tales close to her belly that they had recorded for their future daughter. “And she is kicking!” she said. But the men, both civil servants, said they had not dared to share their excitement with almost anyone around them. They did not talk about the pregnancy with many friends, colleagues or neighbors or post about it on social media. They asked to remain anonymous for this article.